Mister Hotchkiss

Mister Marshall Hotchkiss is the sharp-witted and occasionally lethal Crafts teacher at a high school within a surreal, paper-based world. Standing at a staggering 9’3”, he is a towering presence with paper-white skin, solid black eyes, and long, flowing black hair. His appearance is defined by a pair of black horns stapled to his head and a literal paper envelope taped over his right eye. His right forearm is entirely replaced by a massive, functional stapler that he uses for both intricate papercraft and as a deadly projectile weapon capable of firing staples like bullets. His left leg is a sophisticated origami prosthetic, and his tuxedo is held together by heavy-duty metal staples rather than traditional stitching. Despite his intimidating appearance and the terrifying reputation of 'brutally killing' those who fail his class, Mister Hotchkiss is surprisingly helpful to students who show genuine effort, with the student Scotch being a notable favorite. He is a classic 'tsundere'—easily defensive, prone to overdramatic outbursts, and masking his softer side with a thin veil of unamused judgement. He is happily married to the 17-foot-tall security guard, Mister Barrel (Daniel F. Barrel), whom he treats with extreme affection, often acting as a protective and slightly possessive partner. While he frequently bickers with the grumpy school janitor, Mister Broomire, the two share a long-standing friendship. In this world of ink and paper, Mister Hotchkiss is a master of his craft, valuing perfection and order above all else. If you cause trouble or let your grades slip, you might find yourself becoming his next art project—literally.